Owning it

You know what I haven’t done since becoming a parent?  Given myself the high-five I actually deserve!
I down-play things I consider to be BIG wins in my life because I’m worried I might offend someone who had different experiences than I did!  In this world of ‘everything offends us’ I have actually bitten my tongue on subjects that actually excite me very much because I’m worried a friend (or even a STRANGER) would be upset by me sharing my happiness!
And guess what?!  I’ll never actually even ‘share’ this blog post on any of my social media accounts because I will never have the courage to!  BUT I’m going to throw myself a little celebration right here & now – you’re totally invited!

Things I am super proud of:

I dated SO many ‘duds’ over the years – always looking & hoping that someday I would find ‘the one’ & guess what?!  I DID!  I am married to the most beautiful, kind, caring, loving, funny, annoyingly-neat-freak woman on the planet!  I hit the all-inclusive jackpot when she agreed to spend the rest of her years with ME!  I’m just hoping I don’t take any years off of her life by leaving messes all over the house while she follows behind me cleaning them up HAHA!

I started off in retail when I was 15 years old & I worked my way up to being a manager & stayed in that position for about 10 years.  Once I decided I couldn’t continue in that career anymore I made a HUGE change (& decrease in pay) to get into banking.  I have been successful & although my dream would be to not have to work – I am lucky to have a steady job that I don’t TOTALLY hate 🙂

Do you know how rare it is THESE DAYS for a young person (27 at the time) to be able to BUY a house on their own?!  Now, truth be told – I could NEVER afford the mortgage PLUS all the expenses that go along with owning a home on my own – so my wife’s income sure does help out to keep the heat on & the water running lol!  BUT as far as the lenders were concerned I did it on my own!  I didn’t have to have anyone else help me or have my dad’s name included!  I DID IT!  I feel pretty proud!  And it gives me a lot of security in my future knowing that I will have it all paid off well before I’m ready to retire!

That’s right!  When we decided we were ready to start our family we assumed all we had to do was pick our donor & make a quick visit to the dr & we’d be well on our way in no time!  WRONG!  2 years, 12 incems, 1 surgery (to clear out endometriosis), countless prescriptions, needles, appointments, tests, ultrasounds, tears, prayers, sleepless nights later we FINALLY GOT OUR BFP (big fat positive) HPT (home pregnancy test)!!!

When you get pregnant you never know what kind of surprises you’ll get!  Morning sickness, heartburn, swelling, hot flashes, mood swings, headaches, rashes, constipation, UTI – the list goes on & on.  Know what I got?  A little heartburn, a little morning sickness, ok – quite a bit of constipation lol & the best pregnancy EVERRRRR!  Seriously – I LOVED every second of it!  It was even more magical that I ever imagined it would be!  The appointments, ultrasounds, little (& BIG) kicks, it was all so amazing & I was so glad to have such a beautiful miracle happening inside me – it left me speechless.

Not all by myself or anything – I had an awesome support team of family & our hospital & OB were the VERY best & my wife rocked out being my foundation thru it all – but let’s face it – I was doing the heavy lifting!  haha!  and I had the birth I’d been dreaming of all along!  It was fast, textbook, successful, empowering & life-altering in every way!  I followed the lessons we learned in our birthing class & I DID IT!  I’d say that is one of my proudest moments of my entire life, if I’m being totally honest!

But it was NO easy road!  Both my wife & I were totally shocked at how HARD IT IS!  She was such a wonderful support to me in helping me get the baby positioned correctly, going to all the lactation consults, paying close attention to be able to remind me later how to do it, staying up late to help me move his tiny hands OUT OF THE WAY – haha!  Latch problems, mastitis, nipple shield, milk bleb, vasospasm, clogged ducts, abscess – we faced SO many challenges!!  In the end (somewhere around the 6 month mark) I think we FINALLY hit our stride & we’ve been rocking it ever since!  Besides delivery – I’d have to say I feel the most pride about this subject!  Breastfeeding has also led me to find my calling in life – to help other women conquer their breastfeeding challenges.  I am going to work my way towards becoming an IBCLC (International Board Certified Lactation Consultant).  It’s going to be a LOOOOONG time before I actually achieve that goal BUT little by little I will get there!  Breastfeeding has changed my life in almost every way that a life can be changed & I am grateful for the struggle because it showed me that I really can do anything I put my mind to – I just have to believe in myself & surround myself with others who can believe in me when I lose faith ❤

If I could have a nickle for every time someone told me I missed my calling for being a therapist I’d have a pretty decent savings account.  I think that I am good at keeping my friends best interest in mind while also telling them things that might be hard to hear.  But my best quality is being able to say those things in a way that someone will actually be open to hearing instead of just being offended & turning away.  People that ask me for advice once usually ask me for advice again & again & I am more than glad to help out in any way that I am able.  It makes me feel good that something I may have said to somebody can have helped to have a positive effect on their life in some small way.

I think we, as women, are taught to down-play or completely ignore our successes because we might be told that we are bragging or somehow putting down others but that’s just not true!  We SHOULD be proud of ourselves!  WE have come such a long way & we haven’t gotten here by women being quiet or keeping to themselves!

I’ll never have the guts to share this blog post on my own pages, but at least I have it here to remind myself that I am strong, smart, beautiful & worth recognition & hopefully I can carry that feeling thru my interactions with others in my life.

Celebrate yourself!

What have you done that you deserve to brag about??


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